F16's Don't Kill People, 500 Lb. Bombs Kill People

Things You’ll Never Read In The Journal Star

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:32:06 +0000

…from the Globe and Mail:

"If scientists can help Peter Cottontail get an erection, there may be hope for the other flaccid Peters of the world. "

Compare and Contrast

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 21:18:34 +0000

Flu jabs for children and the sick

Flu jabs for Wall Street workers:

(from Democracy Now)

CDC Criticized for Distributing Scarce Flu Vaccines to Wall St. Firms

And calls are growing for an investigation into why health officials have handed out swine flu vaccines to some of Wall Street’s leading financial firms while they’re unavailable to most Americans. More than a dozen companies were given the vaccines, including Citigroup, Goldman Sachs and JPMorgan Chase. The Center for Disease Control says the companies met several criteria, including having a large number of employees and their own medical staff. But critics say the CDC has violated its own calls to distribute the vaccine only to those at highest risk. In a statement, Melanie Sloan of Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington said, “Although CREW has been unable to uncover the demographic makeup of [these companies], it seems safe to assume the vast majority of their employees are not pregnant women, infants and children, young adults up to 24 years old, and healthcare workers.”

Interesting, no?

Today’s WTF?

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 21:13:03 +0000

I’d make a wisecrack about turning

North Omaha into Gaza, but I don’t want to give them any ideas.

Further WTF? The feds are paying to send them.

RIP Brother Blue

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 18:51:42 +0000

Working in Harvard Square was one of the worst experiences in my entire life, but seeing Brother Blue always lifted the mood of the place. He could do that, just walking through a door.

Brother Blue was a wonderful story teller, and a wonderful human being. Cambridge will never be the same.

File Under, “Holy Shit, I thought He Died Forty Years Ago”

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 21:27:06 +0000

Claude Levi-Strauss dead at 100.

Updated: well, no, not "updated" in that sense-he’s still quite dead. I meant my post-here’s a better obituary from the Guardian.

I know, I know, you were expecting some sort of structuralism joke, but I’m just not on it today. Feel free to have at it in the comments if you’ve a good one.

Classic TV and Candy

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 20:02:54 +0000

I am now the proud owner of 32 episodes of My Favorite Martian on 8 videos for which I paid the absurd sum of seven bucks. It was still sealed in the original box. I also bought some used VHS tapes of Lost in Space. I would have stopped there, but I just found out that you can buy the boxed set of Shindig. Come on, I have to own Shindig. You know you want it too.

In other news, I achieved the Holy Grail of home baking-my own Twix bars. When I made the Jaffa Cakes, I thought I’d managed the impossible, but the candy I made yesterday surpasses pretty much anything I have ever, or could ever hope to create. I should just hang up the apron now-game over. It will never get better than THIS.

Hell yes people, that’s why I’m the mama.

Blogs Aren’t Killing Print Papers-Crap Writing Is

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 22:00:19 +0000

I can’t help but feel sad reading THIS article. I understand they were attempting to be funny-giving guidelines if a costume is too racy-except they didn’t say "racy", they said "slutty". which has a completely different connotation. It is also limited to women.

It should be noted that one of the contributors to this piece is the "parenting expert" that writes family centred articles for the paper. I guess I find it surprising that an editor didn’t reign them in. Isn’t that what editors do? Did they sack all the competent editors with their last remaining decent journalists? I’d say it reads like a High School newspaper, but honestly, that would be insulting to High School papers.

xkcd

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 02:11:07 +0000

THIS is kind of funny.

England, Your England

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 20:56:54 +0000

Well, now it is official-the country has gone utterly mad.

I can’t even summon a nanny-state joke, this is so terribly sad and pathetic.

Onion, or Journal Star

J.S. (not the Watergate felon) Magruder — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 02:29:55 +0000

Our local newspaper has a columnist that is known for dreadful, one sentence paragraphs. She’s a pretty awful writer, but at least she’s concise. No one could ever accuse Cindy Lange Kubick of overwriting a paragraph. We can’t say the same for Lynne Ireland.

Before you pen off angry posts calling me a pretentious ass, keep in mind that I am not collecting a salary to write the rubbish I publish here. What’s more, I could never, on my worst day write a paragraph that included both, "Bee’s beneficence", and "salubrious stickiness". I couldn’t. Really.

You should read the whole thing (OK you probably can’t get through the whole thing, but go have a look anyway-you don’t want to miss out on the "tawny translucence" and "ambrosial nectar."), if only to reinforce the sense that we are, as a society, completely doomed.